The musings of an Idiot.

I haven't updated too much recently about general things but thought I should set the details out here.

Diana got her visa approved today. This is probably the best news I have had in weeks. I cried like a baby when she told me because the relief that now, she will be here on the 24th of November and will be staying over Christmas and New year :D

Also this week, the contract for the sale of my house came through, its signed now and will be back with the solicitors by tomorrow morning :D This also is good news, means I have to push really hard to get stuff sorted to move, like finding a place to move to. :D

Going to see my friend Paul Giffney in London tomorrow if he manages to send me his address! :D

But if he doesn't it will be a weekend of clearing and packing. EEK!

So wish me luck and good wishes. I know a lot of people would love to help me but being so far away already and with no transport other than myself, I understand they won't be there to help. Its fine and no reflection of the friendship I have with them. Life gets in the way and all that.

Anyway, will sign off now, expect me to not be around for a bit with me up to my eyes in stuff to do.

• Leave me a comment saying "When the moon hits your eye, he is standing too close."
• I'll respond by asking you five questions so I can satisfy my curiosity
• Update your journal with the answers to the questions
• Include this explanation in the post and offer to ask other people questions

My questions, from chinese_lily

The answer is not the answer, its the question that is the answer. In other words the journey is the answer and the question all roled into one.

Speaking with Diana this evening was hard, to begin with, but, she at least is a bit more positive now. Last time she was over she got detained by immigration at the airport as she has been over about 7 times in the past two years. Eventually they let her in, but it made her feel like a criminal and horrible. Not a good way to start her stay.

So, we looked and thought it would be a good idea to get her a visitor's visa before coming over here again to hopefully avoid that happening again, or even worse, her being forced to fly straight back.

So, we applied, online, she got her fingerprints and photo done and sent off and we thought it would be just a formality.

Today she got a rejection. The reason, we had not supplied any evidence to back up our claims.

We understand with hindsight, that yes, we should have submitted evidence, but there was no guidelines as to what evidence we needed to send, nor anyone sending information before the rejection saying something to the effect of 'hey, you realise you have to send some stuff to prove your claims you know? we will leave this open for a few days for you to forward some stuff'

Now with less than a week to go before she flies, we are sick with worry, that she will have to move her flight at huge expense because someone in the immigration department couldn't be arsed or even have the foresight to realise that with one contact they would have the information they required.

Our government is so crap.

rant over.

Diana is now divorced! :D Now its only my divorce holding things up before we can apply for her visa to come over permanently. I have all the paperwork ready to submit though so that will be done as soon as possible. Can't wait for her to be with me all the time :D

I am still looking to sell my house, without it selling my job is not secure. They require me to be closer to the office. But, I had a quite excited answerphone message yesterday which I will be following up on that. Who knows, after more than a year on the market through the worst times to selling houses in decades, I might actually have a decent offer that I can afford to accept!

Diana went back to the states last weekend, so missing her horribly, but, we both agree she didn't go home this time, she went to were she currently lives, not where her home is. Here is her home.

Still enjoying my job, had a reasonable week where I was mostly on top of things.

Scary thought is trying to find a place near work I can afford to live in for the time being and packing and moving....not done it for over 12 years! so much accumulated crap! :D


*****UPDATE******

House sale agreed......gulp

I am sitting here, and things possibly are working out a little. I have at least a new job that I start tomorrow. All shiney and new and hopefully won't screw it up. Diana is here with me again and we have been without our luggage for the best part of a week. Still its arrived at the airport and is waiting for a courier to call and drop it off...we shall see what interesting stories their showing up will tell.

I am still majorly skint, sooo skint its not funny, and to top it all off, had some toe rag fire something at my front window and leave what looks like a bullet hole in it. Sheesh. Anyway, will get soemone to look at it, and see what I can do.

I am happy, my girl is here, and I went with her to the Radio big weekend yesterday...Awesome time, and just what we both needed to let off some frustrations with all thats happened.

Well, hmmmmmm. I got a bus and walked to the car rental place, got the car, dropped off ex wife and the kids as they helped get the car for me as I'm so broke. Drove to High Wycombe and did the interview, first response I've heard is positive, will find out more next week when they sit down and decide if I'm going to be employed by them or not.

THen raced down to Newport to hand in last minute documents to get my damaged passport renewed, got there just in time :D So it should arrive a couple of days before I fly to see Diana a week Saturday. :D

Have to hand the car back in tomorrow morning, which is poo, sigh, but with any luck, I'll have a vehicle more permanently by the time I'm back in the country....its looking good...and if it is....then maybe, just maybe.....I can really sort out the crippling debt I'm under.

Well, Interview yesterday went well, they were talking about second interviews and if they are mentioning them, thats always a good sign. Also I know I have a second interview next week with the job I interviewed about last week, the agency said 'Its my job to lose' meaning I am the front runner :D

I also have another viewing on the house on Saturday so will be working on getting some more work done on that too. :D

All in all, its not certain, but its positive :D

Well things have been better, I'll admit, even though they haven't been great.

I have been very antisocial, avoiding talking to people at all rather than feeling like I am just burdening people with my woes again.

But Yesterday things came to a head. For a looong long time I've been trying to cope with crippling debt, and failing miserably. Now at the darkest hour, I have also been fired from my job which also means I lose the company car I had. This was only a couple of months after my own car I was using died on me. After losing my car allowance of £450 per month, I was almost destitute, trying to live on about £600 per month.

THis made me fairly introverted, isolated apart from my kids and my wonderful Diana.

I apologise for not talking with ANYONE else at all.

I don't apologise for not talking still with any of you, I'm unlikely to change that really any time soon unless I suddenly become a person who has no debts and can give good news. I don't want to depress anyone as much as I have the potential to do right now.

I AM keeping myself just above the state of depressed, by force of will and with the help of my kids and Diana.

I cannot afford to get even a cheap banger to get around in so I'm physically isolated as well as mentally. But, I am still ok. I have already had an interview last week that went very well that if it turns out exceptionally, will result in a company car again at least. And I have another interview pending with them and also another interview on Tuesday with a company in Bristol. I will update you either way with those positions.

Again I apologise for not talking with you all, I haven't been in a head space that really is communicative.

Wish me luck and may at least this entry give you hope, that even in dire straights, because I am seriously close to losing my house too, that I can still keep going. I have the best reason to do so, Diana and my kids.

Things are NEVER as bad as you think, and at least I have my health and well wishes.

Later. *HUGS*

Snowed in, tried from 7am to get up my road, up a hill that wasn't gritted. Not a blummin' hells chance with front wheel drive. :( Oh well, trying to get some things sorted at home today then :D

And having a good snowball fight with next door is good. :D

I am in deep deep trouble with debt, to the point that bankrupcy is looking like a viable option. Money goes out and bills are stil not being paid. Sigh. On top of that, my car has literally died, I can't afford a new one, and there are things that mean I might not be able to join the company car scheme at work next week.

Was driving back home, stopped at a set of lights, and when I tried to drive off all I got was a rumbling noise. Turns out my drive shaft has broken and that has destroyed my bearing, moving my nearside wheel forward and jam the brakes onto the disk. Will mean more than £1000 to fix, and the car is just not worth it.

This next week is going to be a very interesting one and one that will change my direction in the coming months for good or for ill.

EEK! I HAVE SO MUCH TO DO! WHY THE HELL AM I WASTING TIME WRITING THIS WHEN I SHOULD BE PACKING AND WRITING LETTERS! *PANIC PANIC PANIC!* :D

Being loved and feeling it as i do every day. Giving love as i do every day. And feeling so happy for my friend Dot, who has gotten the job she dreamed of and is going places that she wants km go. More power to you hun! :)

Going to a school and seeing as I was wandering about sorting out stuff all the little 5-6 years olds doing in front of the rest of the school doing nativity...awwwwww.

A lot of people are doing it and its been a full year with all and sundry...anyway here goes.

1. What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
Saw the Grand canyon, lots of things that don't really belong in a public blog :D, Went to Vegas, Ice Skated, was stupid beyond all reason and generally a new load of stuff.

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Don't make them, but I resolve to be a better person in what ever way I can, that all any of us can really hope for surely?

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Some good friends did, lovely little girls..One in Norway and one in Devon, both within about a week of each other and a facebook friend has one due this week as well. :D

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Luckily this year, no. Though since I nicked this meme from Steve, he came close and I am so incredibly glad he didn't.

5. What countries did you visit?
US & Ireland plus the usual Wales :D

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
Diana here permanently and in the opposite direction, get rid of the debt that hangs over me.

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
I don't do remembering of dates, I use facebook and forum board reminders for those :D But March 27th sticks in my mind as the first day I saw Diana and held her in my arms. :D

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Learning and growing and getting past some terrible mistakes to come out the other side stronger and wiser.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Hurting people that I love.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Had some colds and such, but nothing serious.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My Dragon headed walking stick.

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?
Most of my friends have been incredible to me this year, specifically Becca, at times Dot, and Jessi also a little girl called willow was amazing, just being there, holding her in my arms and looking at this little baby looking up at me was a turning point in the year and took me from a dark place.

13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
Not into naming names but they caused a lot of pain for me this year..they no longer are a person I talk to because of it.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Debt....still is.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Meeting Diana, several times. :D

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
Hey there Dehliala, because I sing it to Diana with her name instead of the original name, the lyrics fit so well in so many ways. :D

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Happier than ever
b) thinner or fatter? About the same, though if Diana has her way, will be feeding me up.
c) richer or poorer? Monetarily, very poor indeed, otherwise the richest person I know.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Being more proactive with my finances

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Procrastinating and being stupid.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
With my kids and Ex, then after christmas day in the US

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?
Completely and utterly.

22. How many one-night stands?
being honest...1 which I regret bitterly.

23. What was your favourite TV program?
At the moment Apparitions with Martin Shaw...awesome show.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Yes

25. What was the best book you read?
Still reading Neil Gaiman's American Gods...great read

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
A band called the Cherry Cokes. Tokyo Irish Rock band.

27. What did you want and get?
Diana :D

28. What did you want and not get?
Being debt free.

29. What was your favourite film of this year?
Ironman

30. What did you do on your birthday
Worry about bills

31.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Winning a massive amount of money...that would have taken a huge weight off me.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Top hat....amazing what it does for people's Hat Envy :D

33. What kept you sane?
Diana and Larp and Friends.

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Nothing springs much to mind but recently saw a little bit of Emily Booth :D

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
US election

36. Who did you miss?
Diana...even though I saw her, not seeing her was a physical pain when we couldn't be together.

37. Who was the best new person you met?
Willow...a likkle baby that was sweetness.

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008:
Don't assume and don't shy away from talking about the hard stuff with the relevant person. It only leads to massive pain.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year
Hey there Diana, whats it like in New York City?

Well, a quieter day yesterday than the weekend :D Needed it...not much sleep :D

The highlight of my day was having a nap when I got home and joking about meeting Diana's friends when I go over...she finally told one who blatantly didn't believe her. Didn't help she hadn't spoken to her since April so went and did the 'april fool' thing :D So now when I meet her I've got to go all Typical American idea of English..pip pip whathoe! LOL Then take her aside and whisper to her that Diana hired me as an actor to play the part of this ficticious englishman :D

LOL!

sunday was fun. Though started with getting woken by one of sam's girlfriend knocking at 8:30 to see if they wanted to in for a dog walk! :) lol! Made scrambled eggs and bacon for all and just chilled with them. Then went off to vampire after dropping them off. :) the session was full of win and lots went on. My happy go lurky vampire was angsty and angry. :) lol. Had pizza with becca and gaf and wound my way home in the early hours. :)

Got hugs from my kids, they spent the night, we played munchkin bites...made spag bol of win again :D spoke to Diana and giggled like a loon. Yup good evening totally. :D

I have decided that its no use going to put up a happy thought for the day, when that day is still ongoing and the source of a lot of happiness is on Eastern Seaboard time in the US. :D Went to the works christmas do too so really couldn't comment then.


Was fun to see jovial insults being swapped about and talking of Moobs by a rather drunk female member of staff who promptly tweaked one male member's nipples about 7 times :D LOL

enjoyed drinking for the first time in ages...lots of JD and coke and generally a great time :D

Tagged by tigerpixie , frasnrasn :D

1. Post about something that made you happy today, even if it’s just a small thing.
2. Do this every day for a week without fail.
3. Tag 8 of your friends to do the same.

Well since its nearly the end of the day, thought I would think about what has made me happy today...firstly working in an infants school and little girls and boys coming up to me and asking my name and going wow over getting their whiteboard working again...that was cute.

Another job where putting up some white cased projectors and the kids enthusiastically telling me thank you for installing an XBOX 360 in their classroom! Giggly.

Seeing my Daughter get an award from her school for being the most improved student in her year for humanities...so proud.

And giggling on the phone with my Diana and discussing visiting Hershey in Pennsylvannia over new years...CHOCOLATE! :D

I think thats enough happy thoughts for today :D

I will not be tagging ohers but if any want to do this feel free. :D